Marilyn vos Savant is an idiot

// September 10th, 2003 // Ranting

In last Sunday’s Parade Magazine‘s “Ask Marilyn” column, here’s a Q&A she had with a reader:

My girlfriend says that alcoholic drinks are drugs because of their intoxicating effect. But by that reasoning, any number of substances can be classified as drugs — for example, hobby glue, which is sometimes sniffed to cause intoxication. I say that alcoholic drinks are food. My argument is that they contain calories. What’s the verdict, Marilyn?

The purpose of drinking alcohol is for its intoxicating effect (even if you have no intention of drinking to excess). Virtually no one drinks it as food. So I consider alcohol a drug. But the use of hobby glue is for adhesive applications. Relatively few people use it as a drug. So I call hobby glue an adhesive. Did you know that glue has calories? With your argument, you’d be stuck calling glue a food!

What a dipshit. Both of them. Usually I don’t want to waste my time reading her article, much less reply to her, but here I go:

Marilyn –

In your September 7 column in “Parade Magazine”, you replied to a reader’s question concerning alcohol not being a food. I was most taken aback by your comments, “virtually no one drinks [alcohol] as a food” and, “the purpose of drinking alcohol is for its intoxicating effect.” I’m not saying wine is a “food” per se, but as an appreciator of fine wines, I must abherently disagree with your statement.

I cannot be the only person who would find it hard to believe that every person who pairs wines with foods is setting out to appreciate the intoxicating effects of the wines. While it’s certainly true that drinking a significant amount of wine will cause an intoxicating effect, it’s most certainly not the sole cause for drinking it. Many (I dare say “most”) chefs who recommend wine pairings with dishes are most interested in making sure the wines complement the meal in taste, not intoxicating effect. Should I be lead to believe that “Food and Wine Magazine” decided to pair those two items together to mean, “Food and something to give you a buzz?”

I can only imagine that, due to the limitations you have on articles in “Parade”, you were not able to be clearer in your meaning. Perhaps you meant that alcohol is not drunk as a food in that a person does not normally drink it to gain a day’s nutrients (i.e., One wouldn’t typically see a person drink a glass of beer as a snack).

OK, so I embellished with the beer as a snack statement. Who doesn’t do that?!

10 Responses to “Marilyn vos Savant is an idiot”

  1. Gauss says:
    April 13, 2004 at 4:21 AM

    Marilyn sucked all of her mathematical knowledge out of my cock. I consider cock a food.

  2. Megan says:
    May 12, 2004 at 4:37 PM

    Marylin’s a dumbass. Did she ever write back to you?

  3. Gudlyf says:
    May 12, 2004 at 6:10 PM

    No, she didn’t. But does that surprise you? I don’t think she’d ever admit she was wrong or out of line.

  4. airbravado says:
    May 13, 2004 at 7:23 PM

    How might I contact Marilyn vos Savant? I’m just curious in case of any future,stupid responses (as typical) by her.

  5. Gudlyf says:
    May 13, 2004 at 7:52 PM

    Try this link: http://www.marilynvossavant.com/form.html. Oh, and nice URL you’ve got there. ;-)

  6. Ryan Scott says:
    May 3, 2005 at 11:14 AM

    You would think that the person with the highest IQ at the moment would know about wine being food. At the winetastings I go to, in particular on distributor, most of them say that wine is meant to be enjoyed with food, and wine is food. I say they are right, Marilyn is deeply faulted. I rarely drink any alcohol to get the buzz. I drink wine for the myriad of tastes, I drink beer for the same reason. If I have a beer it is usually one only, and a highly flavorful and deep beer such as Guiness. I actually enjoy the myriad tastes in a good wine or beer, I rarely enjoy the buzz nearly so much.

  7. R.M.Healey says:
    July 21, 2006 at 4:32 AM

    Marilyn is right. Wine, however good it tastes and despite the nutrients it contains, cannot be a food because it contains a toxin–alcohol. When we get a buzz from wine we are actually being poisoned. I love wine and all forms of alcohol, but i am under no illusion that when I consume alcoholic drinks I am feeding myself . Look at it this way. Magic mushrooms contain nutrients, but who ever heard of eating them as FOOD ?
    A Mensan.

  8. Lawrence says:
    April 6, 2007 at 4:42 PM

    Good Lord! Resorting to name calling is a bit harsh, and childish, I might add. If you disagree with Marilyn’s opinion, fair enough! However, since 5th grade name calling is your game, try this word, ‘egocentric’. Also, try a sophisticated approach to your insults, yes? For example; You ooze monomaniacal “jeanyus”, and you’re clearly proud for the deed. You sir, are insufferably supercilious, and should be the poster child for euthanasia.
    Must I say it? -So goes the cliché? Marilyn is human, and thus entitled to her fair share of mistakes. At least she’s classy.

  9. Rob Judd says:
    March 28, 2008 at 11:56 PM

    The reply to Marylin’s correct answer shows a naivete which indicates a lack of study of logical fallacy. That SOME people enjoy wine as an adjunct to food does not mean that MOST people regard any alcoholic beverage as a food. Wine appreciation is relatively new compared to the history of alcohol consumption.

    In Germany, beer is legally regarded as a food product because of the stringent laws relating to its manufacture. However, legislating such doesn’t make it truth, and nor does beer represent all classes of alcohol. And despite the urban myth to the contrary, one cannot live on beer alone.

    Nope, there isn’t any way she’s wrong on this.

  10. Charlie says:
    April 13, 2008 at 5:08 PM

    Apparently you can’t read, Gudlyf. Marilyn never wrote that “wine isn’t a food”, as you claim. She said “virtually no one drinks alcohol as food”. Alcohol, see? In other words, in your example, if it were possible to make wine that tastes exactly the same but has no intoxicating effect, it would still be “wine” (the beverage) but there would be no “alcohol” (the drug). And thus the only people interested specifically in the alcohol would be those trying to get intoxicated. Maybe you should try reading what other people write (and using your brain) before throwing a tantrum. And maybe also buy a dictionary and check the definition of “drug”.